To Play to His Tune.


The surrendered bow,
A tool in the musician’s right hand to make music.
The bow has no choice of direction; it simply follows the guided hand. The hairs are stretched tight, uncomfortable, yet when pulled just so it produces music that inspires people and brings holy tears.

Music that moves individuals closer to God, the Maker of Life itself.
What if you and I could have the same power as a violin in a crowded world? What if our quiet surrenders could call people to JESUS?
What if you and I could motivate people, encourage others to seek fully after God? What if our quiet surrender was what allowed others to see Him, hear Him, in the dark? What if our lives were the beautiful song, the testimony of His grace in the middle of brokenness?
“There are many are the plans in a man’s heart, nevertheless the LORD’s counsel that will stand.” Prov. 19:21 (NJKV)

In many ways, this is how God is with me.
I complain and tell the Lord how I believe the song of my life should be written. This thing should happen here, and then this will happen, so the song of my life should sound like so. I must let God lead me in His own personal song for me, a song of surrender, a release of control.  I must release how I want my life to look and not expect my music to sound like anyone else’s. God’s plan for each of us is uniquely structured so He can receive the most glory, even through our broken hearts.

The painful hours of being lifted and played God’s way is necessary in life, for growth. My pulling and pushing away from God, from growing His way, only makes things harder, less harmonious. My stubborn spirit only makes the process of surrender longer. This struggle hinders intimacy with my Creator and stunts my growth.
Why would I argue with the Maker of life itself? The bow does not have a mind of its own. It can make no music unless a hand holds it, and guides it, carefully purring the right strings, at the right time, to the music written before the musician. The music is not random, but carefully chosen. When God pulls me in certain directions, I wonder why? How? This makes no sense! I can’t see what You’re doing God! Can’t you tell me? Change the music! Change the key, make it lower, higher! Make the pain go away! Make me beautiful and holy without suffering!

On and on my demands go….

No one chooses difficulty. But that is what makes us stronger, makes us understand God’s love, and know His presence in ways that would’ve been foggy before. Some of the notes will make no sense until the song of my life is finished, and the LORD lifts the bow. Finished, His way, His timing.
Then it all will make sense, every struggle. I will see the notes on the side of eternity and every heartache, tear, and unanswered question will make sense. I will wish that I had surrendered sooner, given more, and complained less.
I want to rest in Him and allow Him to lead, allowing Him to conduct my life, one measure at a time.
Until the end of my piece, the end of my life.
When the bow is finally raised, may the applause be for JESUS, my KING.


“For My thoughts, are not your thoughts, nor are your ways My ways,’ says the LORD. For as the heavens are higher than the earth, so are My ways higher than your ways, and My thoughts than your thoughts.” Isaiah 55:8-9 (NKJV)





photos taken by Anna. ❤

Thank you to my lovely editor C.A. M. ❤


He is Waiting, With Open Arms

20190711_080011As I stood over the oven as my momma took the chicken out of the oven, as she had a thousand times before: something hit me.  Below my sincere excitement to marry my childhood sweetheart was the realization that I was leaving. When I get married, I will not be with my family and though they will always love me, it won’t be the same anymore.
I was reminded that God is with me. He is here, right now. My Jesus, Abba Father is with me as I prepare for this next chapter. When I think waiting is too hard, Jesus is with me. When I don’t understand, Jesus is with me.  When I move away Jesus will be with me as I start my new life and attempt to take the chicken out of my own oven. 🙂  My Jesus will be with my mom as she pours her afternoon cup of coffee alone and  prays for me. It’s a sad knowing that as an adult I cannot have all those I cherish near at the same time.  I will probably always miss someone. Some days I miss my grandpa in ways I haven’t  before. I wish he was here to share in these special moments of anticipation. But I am thankful for all the memories I had with him. Now these memories have become treasures I cherish.

It is such a comfort and a joy to know that my Jesus is always present. He is there in the quiet when no one sees, when no one hears. He is there in the moments of sheer joy and laughter. He is there amid our noisy, chaotic lives. He is there, with arms open. He is there when I am nervous and the lies creep in and the doubts dare to sabotage the Truth. Jesus is my protector as He covers me with His shield of Truth and reminds me of the promises of His Word. He is there. Waiting to be our refuge. Waiting and wanting to be our everything.


Recently, I have read Psalm 91. It’s  assuring to know of God’s sovereignty and personal protection. When I am too weak spiritually and physically, I must allow God’s Word to wash over me. When the lies come and sin entices me I want to saturate myself in His promises and cling to His Word.
“The one who lives under the protection of the Most High dwells in the shadow of the Almighty. I will say to the LORD, ‘My refuge and my fortress, my God, in whom I trust.’ He Himself will deliver you from the hunter’s net, from the destructive plague. He will cover you with His feathers; you will take refuge under His wings. His faithfulness will be a protective shield.” Psalm 91:1-4 (2104) (HCSB)
Jesus is waiting and wants you to run to Him so that He can cover you. Is He your refuge tonight? Only He can truly satisfy.

Dear friend, I don’t know who you yearn for tonight. Maybe you ache for a child who has left home, or  for your marriage to be healed, or for a loved one who has died. Jesus is here. Jesus is waiting for you to run to Him. Jump into His loving arms. He is here. He is waiting. ❤


Anna. ❤



Holman Christian Standard Bible; The Study Bible for Women [Book]. – Nashville : Holman Bible Publishers , 2104.


Whining or Worshipping?


Waiting and Whining or Waiting and Worshipping?
Let’s face it. We all have to wait. We wait for the ramen in the microwave, for the light to turn green, and for bigger things: job promotion, an increase in pay, or growth in relationships. Prolonged anticipation is never easy. I think the hardest time to wait is when you don’t know if the wait will ever end.
“Consider it a great joy, my brothers, whenever you experience various trials, knowing that the testing of your faith produces endurance. But endurance must do its complete work, so that you may be mature and complete, lacking nothing. “James 1:2-4 HCSB

When God’s teaching me patience it can take a long time….. I think this is because I don’t listen and try to hurry the process along. While I am in the waiting waters, I struggle to stop and listen to what God is saying in the present time. I become blind to His blessings and instead hold a laser gaze on what I want NOW. I do not allow patience to be molded into me by the trials God allows into my life. I let myself think that I am suffering because God has withheld something when in fact God knows that it is not the right time for me to have what I want. Through this withholding God wants to cultivate richer intimacy with Him. Because once I reach my goal there will be something else to be reached and I will squirm again as God tries to teach me patience and cultivate a quiet heart towards Him. The goal cannot be getting what I want. Rather the goal must be receiving more of God, learning to enjoy His presence, and listening and obeying His voice. In the Old Testament Sarah grew tired of waiting for her promised child and so she took matters into her own hands. This resulted in years of heartache and regret. She did not allow herself to seek God first during her wait. How many times later did Sarah feel pangs of regret over her quick fix? What we do in an instant can impact and change those around us long after. (See Gen. 16 for full account.)

During a winter of waiting I am more susceptible to sin because I feel that it’s justifiable. I wouldn’t verbalize that, but I act that way. I complain and am more critical of those around me. I glaze over my sin and focus on the sin of others and think I am more spiritually for it. (Matt. 7:1-6) I also give into more of my whims and indulgent desires all to help ease the void in my life rather than turning to God during moments of emptiness and longing. All these things are a way of my acting in rebellion towards God’s season of waiting. I can make my waiting season longer simply due to my lack of obedience and surrender to His plan.

God’s withholding  may feel like suffering, but that’s because I can’t  see the whole picture. God may give me what I want now and then I wouldn’t use it for it’s God intended purpose. When I was about seven years old, I had a super cool Cinderella umbrella with a blue handle. Was that umbrella used in the rain? Uh,no way! Why wait that long? I ran around the backyard waving my umbrella singing “Let’s Go Fly a Kite” at the top of my lungs! My umbrella was open and with each wind gust I was certain that I would actually begin to fly. But after flying day after day, my umbrella began to tire a little faster than I did. And then there was the sad day when my umbrella broke. I was sad. No more Mary Poppins adventures.

Sometimes I think my dreams and deepest desires are similar to my Cinderella umbrella. I want it now and God knows that if I get what I want now that I will not be able to use it for its intended purpose. I will be like a seven-year-old who is happy for a short time before reality strikes. I’m sure it rained shortly after and I was wet because I had misused my umbrella. I had to wait before I could get another one.

God also chooses to wait. He could have Jesus come back right now to rapture the church and yet He waits because He knows of one more person that is so close to letting Him in, and He knows of another person that everyone says is too far gone for Jesus. God smiles because He knows better. He knows what others cannot know and sees what others cannot see without eyes of faith. God waits for people to come to Him, waits for His children to desire more of Him. God could make us change but He blessed us with free will and He gently waits, calling us closer to Him.
“The Lord is not slack concerning His promise, as some count slackness, but is longsuffering toward us, not willing that any should perish but that all should come to repentance.” 2 Peter 3:9 NKJV

In the garden after God had created everything He rested.
“Thus the heavens and the earth and all the host of them, were finished. And on the seventh day God ended His work which He had done, and He rested on the seventh day from all His work which He had done. Then God blessed the seventh day and sanctified it, because in it He rested from all His work which God had created and made.” Gen. 2:1-3.
God could’ve been anxious about all the people He would make and the happenings of the world.  But God was not in a hurry. He is outside of time. And so, He waited and rested from creating on the seventh day. He rested. Knowing He was in control. He set a precedent of trusting Him to guide the course of our lives.

So, I can imagine that you are waiting for something. Look for ways to grow in your relationship with God. Rather than becoming bored in the wait, look for new ways to be renewed in His presence. Go look at the sunset, see the dew drops after the rain or sense God’s power with the hurricane. Crack open your Bible. His Word is so alive that it speaks to me something different every time! Don’t waste this beautiful time of waiting, anticipation, and longing.
“Wait on the LORD and be of good courage, and He shall strengthen your heart; Wait I say on the LORD!” Psalm 27:14
Much Love,
Anna. ❤


“For I consider that the sufferings of this present time are not worthy to be compared with the glory which shall be revealed in us.” Romans 8:18.