I was broken, shattered. God asked for my all. I gave all to Jesus but I had nothing left to give. I was like a glass of water giving Jesus my very last drop. But you know what? Jesus took my nothing, broken, sinful, heart, and He used me in spite of myself.
Matt. 14. The people were eager to hear from Jesus…but they were hungry and there wasn’t any McDonalds lurking around the corner. So, the disciples came to Jesus asking Him to send the people away. (14:15) Jesus had come to the deserted place to be alone and to grieve the loss of a friend. It would have been quite easy for Jesus to have turned the people away. But Jesus says “They do not need to go away. You give them something to eat” Mt. 14:16. Jesus can perform miracles on His own. Jesus doesn’t need us but He chooses to use us. The disciples don’t sound to enthused when they tell Jesus that all they have is five loaves and two fishes. Evidently the Son of God couldn’t use one little boy’s everything?
Maybe you think God couldn’t use
Your tiny bank account
your shattered, blistered heart
your busy schedule
your messed up family.
Ah, but wait. Jesus takes the loaves. He didn’t say there were to small, to insignificant, or to ordinary. He blessed the loaves. “And He took the five loaves and two fish, and looking up to Heaven, He blessed and broke and gave the loaves to the disciples; and the disciples gave to the multitudes” Matt 14:19b. (emphasis added) Christine Caine said it wonderfully when she said that Jesus was blessing what was not there. Jesus blessed the loaves first. Jesus was giving thanks for something none of the other hungry people could see. They were starving and wondered why God was blessing what obviously couldn’t feed every hungry belly. But God saw what everyone else couldn’t see. Sometimes God is at work even when we cannot see. And then Jesus broke the loaves.
Am I willing to be broken for Jesus?
I think that God breaks us so we can better bring Him glory.
I have realized this in my own life. I think I used to think that if I followed God my life would be a perfect, calm ocean. But that is not the case. Like, most people I avoid any trial as much as possible. I will do anything to avoid even the slightest tinge of discomfort. But I think that God has allowed certain heartache, devastation, and pain to thunder on my life in order to show me 1) my inadequacy. I cannot accomplish anything good apart from Christ and 2) God has helped me empathize more. I understand pain that I wouldn’t have had God kept me in the land of the comfortable.
If I allow God to break me I may never know why. I may not always see how God is working behind the scenes but I hope that through my brokenness a multitude may know more about how great my Jesus is! This Christmas let our broken lives shine Jesus to the multitudes at work, home, and the world!
For His glory,